I'm in Omaha on vacation. I come here about 5-6 times a year to see friends and family.
I've been here since the 2nd, and this is the third time that someone I've had plans with has conveniently "forgotten" about them, or has had something else suddenly come up so they can't hang out. Or, they would rather chill with someone they see every day than spend time with me, who they see only once every few months.

Is there something wrong with me that I can't see?
Am I horrible to be around? I just don't understand why friends that I used to be so close to don't want to hang out with me anymore.

...And why do little things like this throw me into a mini-depression? I wish I knew how to combat feeling like this because I hate being depressed, especially when I'm trying to enjoy my vacation. =\

TEN random things about me

1. I drive a maroon Buick. *gasp*
2. I'm 18 and I still play with dolls.
3. I bite my nails. u_u
4. I love riding horses.
5. I once went swimming in Lake Michigan when the water was only 42 degrees. That's only 10 degrees above freezing.
6. Dawn is my favorite time of day. I only see it about once a month, and it's usually when I've stayed up all night. ^^;
7. I have a kitty named Luther Goliath Alphonse Tivrusky VII. He's a fierce little grey-and-white ball of fluff.
8. I'm always afraid that people are judging me.
9. I like to bellydance and do yoga.
10. I wanna have a spiritual journey. :D

NINE ways to win my heart

1. Don't judge me! Accept me for who I am.
2. Randomly do something nice for me, like bake cookies and give me one. :D ( wanna know more about me? )

I'll be in Omaha from Friday (June 2nd) until the 10th, maybe later. Let me know if you want to get together! <3

-Saiya

I've been really busy the last couple weeks, but I decided to give myself an hour to dork around on the computer since I haven't had any time to do anything fun lately. So yeah, here's a thingy:

I stole this all ninja-like from pantslessfez... only I changed it from 20 songs to 30 songs since I was having fun doing it. ^.^
A lot of this music is probably too old for most of you... ^^; And sorry if any of the lyrics are slightly off. =P

Step 1: Put your MP3 player or whatever on random.
Step 2: Post a line from the first 30 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.
Step 3: Let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 4: Strike out the songs when someone guesses correctly and put their name next to the song.
Step 5: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING!

1. All the servants in your new hotel throw their roses at your feet mela_chan
2. I've been first and last, look at how the time goes past
3. So I run and hide, tear myself up
4. If I made you feel second best, girl I'm sorry I was blind
5. It's like a vision of love that seems to be true kkittykat204
6. Remember when we'd celebrate? We'd drink and get high until light...
7. I wish that I could fly, why do I even try?
8. You keep samein' when you oughta be changin'
9. Even if ya like me, fuck you!
10. 'Cause now and then she'll get to worrying mela_chan
11. Come down now, they'll say... roxyk630
12. You can hang out with all the boys roxyk630
13. Who's that castin' devious stares in my direction? pantslessfez
14. I can play the guitar like a motherfucking riot kkittykat204
15. And I say your uncle was a crooked French Canadian mela_chan
16. Once I ran to you, now I run from you pantslessfez
17. She's a very kinky girl, the kind you don't take home to Mother roxyk630
18. You look at me like maybe I'm an angel underneath, innocent and sweet pantslessfez
19. No squealing, remember that it's all in your head blueameko
20. Something in your eyes calls to mind the silver screen and all its sad goodbyes
21. I'm so intoxicated, I feel supernatural
22. Every time I close my eyes I start to drift away kkittykat204
23. You make my heart sing, you make everything groovy roxyk630
24. You remain my power, my pleasure, my pain roxyk630
25. Don't hang on, nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky roxyk630
26. When it gets cold outside and ya got nobody to love kkittykat204
27. She’s changing her name from Kitty to Karen pantslessfez
28. And there I go jumpin' before the gunshot has gone off
29. And can you hear the sound of the stereo? The subliminal mindfuck America pantslessfez
30. Bismillah! We will not let you go! Let me go! roxyk630

Have fun! ^.~

Read it before you bash me! It's supposed to be satirical and humorous.

( 12 reasons why homosexual marriage will ruin society )

I had the weirdest dreams last night.

Okay, first off, I don't remember the beginning of the first dream, but it was something about me setting my old house on fire. But then I remember participating in a swimming race against little kids to win a beautiful painting from a local artist. I lost. XD Then an ex and I were looking at paintings, but we couldn't afford any. And then I woke up and rolled over and fell asleep again.

The second dream, it was the end of the semester and everyone got new roommates for their dorms. I was put into a communal room in the basement with four other girls. They were all those badass-type girls. Yippee. Anyway, one of the girls wanted to go to the ATM, but there were some special rules or something, so Roger, our "RA" type person made the girl and her boyfriend (who happened to look like my ex, Aaron) take all their jewelry off, and then we (I'm not sure why I went) went upstairs. We got in an elevator, but before the doors closed the girl snatched her jewelry back and made a run for it. Roger handcuffed her boyfriend to me and then took off after her. The handcuffs were loose and I slipped out of mine easily. Her boyfriend said, "Oh, that's alright" and then grabbed my hand. The elevator closed, but instead of going to somewhere with an ATM, the elevator took us back downstairs, to my basement dorm. The boyfriend guy stayed in the elevator while I got out. I went to my room and it was on fire! There was someone standing in the room, and he slowly walked out, his clothing aflame, and I noticed that he didn't have a mouth. This is someone I know, but for their sake and mine, I'm leaving the name out. I grabbed the fire extinguisher and put the flames on him out and then all the flames in the room, and then hugged him and held him while he cried. In real life, he's shorter than me, but in the dream he was a fraction of an inch taller. He hugged me so hard, I thought he was trying to push himself through me. And then he kissed me, and suddenly he had a mouth! And then, of course, the alarm went off. WHO SETS AN ALARM ON WEEKENDS!? *stabs her roommate*



Anyway, any interpretations? I'm pretty confused.

I never thought I'd say this, but...for my birthday, I want clothes.

I know it's two months away, but I really need some new shirts.
I'd like some funny t-shirts, and not cliche ones like, "Your village called, their idiot is missing." or anything like that.
Anything to do with video games or computers is fine, and anything else generally funny would be great, too. Being a college student, I can't really afford to buy my own clothes anymore. XD
Oh, and if someone wants to get me Alexander on DVD or The Persian Boy (book), I wouldn't say no to those, either. BUY ME STUFF! >:O

If you DO get me a t-shirt, please make sure it's appropriate enough I can wear it to school. Otherwise it won't get much use. =\

Thanks folks. I expect many packages in the mail come October 24th! XD

...or just a "Hey Saiya, Happy Birthday" would be fine.


Speaking of birthdays... HAPPY FREAKING BIRTHDAY, ALLY! :D! I know it's not for another day, but I wanted to say it while we're on the topic. <3

I promised some of you guys photos of my dorm room, so here they are. It needs to be decorated better. ;-;

( behold the plain-ness! )

I went job-hunting today. Let's hope I get hired at either Blockbuster or Walmart. I don't want to work at Braums, Pizza Hut, Country Market, or Dillons. ><



Adelai and I just got done watching Alexander.

( what I thought )


Bagoas is HOT.

Watching him dance has motivated me to start dancing again, which also means I need to finish my new bellydancing outfit. I hope it's not too big now, since I've lost weight since I sewed it together. I suppose I can always take it in a little if it does turn out to fit weird. I'll post pictures (or a video, if you're lucky! :O) when I'm done. ^^

( wow )



And Adelai is hot, too. :3

( what a cutie <3 )

This post is very image intense. Dial-up fetishists, beware.

While I thought I'd post an "OMG HE'S HERE" post when my boy arrived, I didn't. I was too busy playing with him! XD; In any case, here's my first doll post! I'm trying to think of a name for my doll journal. Any ideas?

I'm sorry these photos are so bad. It's a combination of the fact that I have a crappy camera and crappy lighting inside. I HAD planned to take him outside for a shoot today, but it's raining. ;-;

Both dolls in these photos were painted by me. *beams with pride* I must note that these are my first attempts and are pitiful at best. Also, neither of them have upper lashes yet. ^^;

Dolls!

( So pretty... )

No photos of Yoichi until he comes back from shinkouchou. ^^

Flist cut! If I cut you and you want to be added back, you'll have to give me good reasons why I should. :D

I got bored and I wanted to draw some doll-inspired art, but I always see everyone drawing dolls like people. Why not draw dolls like dolls? That's what they are, afterall. So after asking Kaitou's owner if I could borrow his likeness for my drawing, I finished this little sketch. Here ya go!

Fuck, I sound like Neil Goldman from Family Guy. Damn retainer.



...not only that, they gave me purple when I asked for red. >

Help me decide. I have until tomorrow night.

Which doll should I get?
While El is very pretty, Chiwoo can be gorgeous as well, but also has a cuteness factor that is hard to get with El. El is more sophisticated-looking, and Chiwoo is more boy-next-door looking. I'm leaning toward Chiwoo. Help me decide!

( full photos under here )


EL




CHIWOO





Poll #516724 Which doll?
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 24

Which doll should I choose?

Please comment with why you chose who you did!

Yoinked from blue_ameko


The ULTIMATE JRock Survey
275 Questions for the Not-Too-Faint of Heart

______General______
001) How did you discover JRock? Ponderosa posted photos of Gackt. I researched. I found Illuminati PV. I fell in love. XD <3
002) When did you discover JRock? December 23, 2003.
003) So how long have you been a fan then? 1 1/2 years.
004) Are you a fan of Visual Kei? Yes.
005) Are you a fan of JPop? Some. ^^
006) Are you a fan of fanservice? ...is the sky blue?

______Firsts______
007) First solo artist you heard? Gackt.
008) First band/group you heard? Malice Mizer.
009) First JRock crush? I hate to admit it, but... Mana. u_u;
( read on... )





And... I'm done. Yay.

I am NOT too old to play with dolls, Jason.

( I think you're just jealous they're sexier than you. )

( spec-fucking-tacular )

//eta// I really like Ryan, and I really hope he doesn't have to cancel our plans to go to prom. If he does, I think I'll just stay home; I don't want to go alone again, and I can't think of anyone else to go with. The last thing I need right now is more stress from something like this, but it's my life-- did I expect something was going to go smoothly for once? I guess I did. Too fucking bad, Saiya.

I did a friends list cut.

If you were cut, it's probably for one of these reasons:
1. We don't get along all that well
2. We never talk (the most people were cut for this reason)
3. You post nothing but quizzes or memes in your journal
4. You're a retarded fangirl and I don't want to deal with your retarded fangirlism
5. You never post

( people who were cut )


Sorry if you were cut. If you want to know why, then ask me.

Trying to find a pair of boots for my cosplay without actually visiting the dreaded store...
I found these. Anyone who wants to cosplay Mitsu to Tsuba!Toshiya should take a look. I'm thinking about getting a pair just for kicks. =3